Stanley's Star Wars, or Why Gay Men are the Root of All Evil...
May 20, 2002
Does Stanley Kurtz really share the same planet as the rest of us or is he just going through the motions, all the while mentally occupying a plane of Star Wars like fantasy where gay men are the cause of all the evil in the universe?
The later I think.
Imagine that someone had said, back in the 1970s, when homosexuals were flooding into Catholic seminaries all over the U.S., that substantial numbers of gay priests, far from accepting the rule of celibacy, would deliberately flout that rule, both in theory and in practice. Suppose that someone had argued that homosexual priests would gain control of many seminaries, that many would openly "date," that many would actively cultivate an ethos of gay solidarity and promote a homosexual culture that would drive away heterosexuals � especially theologically orthodox heterosexuals � from the priesthood. Suppose this person went on to argue that, at its extreme, the growing gay subculture of the priesthood would tolerate and protect not only flagrant violations of celibacy, but even the abuse of minors. Then suppose that this person predicted eventual public exposure of the whole sordid mess, an exposure that would precipitate a crisis within the Church itself.
Bah! Ha! Ha! Yes, our great plan is finally coming to fruition! (Is that a pun?) The great Homosexual Subversion is a smashing success! We knew that the problems of secrecy and authoritarianism, coupled with a view of sexuality formed when camels were seen as more important than women, wasn't going to be enough to undue the Catholic Church. No! We had to penetrate (another pun? Nahh..) the very heart of Catholicism and start our grand, 30 year plan to pull it down from within!
Did I just wake up in a queer version of Star Wars or something? Are gays the new Clones or ? (More to the point: does this mean I actually have a shot at Hayden? Ewan? Temuera? Yoda?) If we are the Clones destined to take over the Republic, convert it into an Empire and corrupt poor defenseless Anakin, does that mean that Palpataine -- the evil Emperor, the head Dark Lord of the Sith-- is actually...
*gasp*
What's clear from Berry's account is that sexual abuse of boys by homosexual priests (the typical form of abuse in the current scandal) was part and parcel of a larger gay subculture within the priesthood, a subculture that effectively enabled the abuse of minors by encouraging flagrant homosexuality, and openly flouting the rule of celibacy itself.
Funny. I thought the abuse happened because those who were supposed to put a stop to it -- you know, the Cardinals -- covered their holy asses, transferred people about, paid off complainers and generally hid behind the sanctity of Sanctimony? Or did I miss something?
Isn't it just a bit odd though that, with all of these invading hordes of homosexuals -- which must be like invading hordes of Moslems, only better dressed, better cooks, able to ride in time to the latest "Pet Shop Boys" album and can do wonders with old, musty Cathedrals through judicial uses of color swatches, accent mirrors and Salvation Army Castoffs-- the incident rates for sexual abuse is basically the same for boys, girls, adolescent males and adolescent females? Could that mean that wacked-in-the-head gay priests occur in the same numbers as wacked in the head straight priests?
THE SKY THAT FELL
This is exactly what has happened to the Church. It has been at least 30 years since the homosexual presence in the priesthood began to increase markedly. All along there were signs of trouble, yet no profound institutional crisis.
Exceedingly odd, isn't it, that the majority of cases of abuse cited so far in the press are ten, twenty and sometimes even 30 years old? It doesn't seem to be that many young priests -- you know, those all of those new, subversive clones that have invaded the noble republic -- that are carrying out the abuse, but a bunch of crusty old men who came of age well before the "decadent" revolution of gay rights? Odd and telling...
Here is a case in which gay sexual culture has not been tamed by, but has instead dramatically subverted, a venerable social institution � an institution built around an ethic that is a first cousin to marital fidelity itself...
Oh yeah, like that happened. Those 50% of marriages that ended in divorce were all gay men who secretly married clueless women, only to divorce them later for some nefarious goal. And that 25 to 40% of marital infidelity? Yup. Gay men were sleeping with women (other than their clueless wives) to further demolish the notion of fidelity. (All that sleeping with women and we still found time to sleep with each other. Thank god for Palm Pilots.)
You know, when we gays sit around our secret bathhouses, performing centuries old dark Sith rites on children, animals and the various droids we've managed to abduct, we love to laugh and chortle about how successful we've been in destroying....well everything. Baseball, football, cars, fashion, education, capitalism, gun ownership, frequent flier mileage and of course, Coke-a-Cola (New Coke? BAHAHAHAHA!!!!). Yes, we all sleep better at night (together, in one large orgy, drifting off to "Over the Rainbow") knowing that it wasn't human frailty, ambition, hubris, greed and arrogance -- human traits residing equally in both hetero's and homo's -- that has greatly tarnished the Catholic Church, but rather our evil, centuries old plans, endemic to homosexuals and only homosexuals, that brought to glorious fruition this grand event.
Yes, yes, Stanley, we've only just started. You see, for our next trick (there's that punning again) I'd like to show you this thing we're building called the Death Star....
Posted by Jody at May 20, 2002 12:52 PM